66 Days & Doubts

Wow! It's been FOREVER! I don't know if I could be stretched any thinner than I am at the moment. I think it's because I am actually taking time for myself. I KNOW!! So weird. I'm taking time to heal myself.

Lets see.... what do I do? I play Viva Pinata!!! for about an hour to two before C gets home. Then when he gets home I have a good hour dedicated to him. Probably my favorite part of the day! Then I do wedding stuff, job look up stuff, and any other things that C wants to do. I've been going to bed between 7pm-9pm too! So between 4:30pm-7:00pm is when I do all the extra things. I haven't been staying up as late because I have been working at 4am... which means I need to wake up 2:15am - 2:45am to get ready and leave so I can get to work by 4am.

Anyway! 66 days left!!!! We're really excited! But yesterday, I was looking at houses, and I thought, WOW! We could totally buy a really nice starter house without a down payment and pay either less or equal to what we're paying for rent right now. I know C would never ever do that, but when I told him about what I found he was actually happy. Not a "Hey Honey, let's go buy one!!" but more excitement than I thought he would have. Then I thought... Damnnnnn.. I wish we could go look at houses for real now! I wish we weren't having a big hitched ceremony.  I told C that and he laughed at me and said shoulda thought about that earlier! hahaha.

Don't worry! We're still going through with the wedding!! And still extremely excited!

Back to houses! I found a lot of starter houses that we could do now that would work with 1 kid until it's about 5... but not 2 kids. And by the time we start having kids, we'll have to have them a year apart. oorrr 9 months + any healing time to get preggers again. Guess why!!!! We're back on the 5 year plan! hahaha.

Background of the 5 year plan: We've been asked "When are you getting married?" by everyone and their mother. Well, I've been asked that by everyone and their mother. I started coming back with a BS answer that really didn't have any value in our decision... "5 years" was my constant reply. No matter if it was "5 years" the 3 years before then. I would always give "5 years" as my answer. So now that the "5 year" to marriage run is over... we've got another :p.

"5 years" to kids! Which puts me at 28... which also gets me really close to having kids that come out with problems. And at the moment, I can't see me having the patience and love to raise and take care of a kid with problems. So! 28 & 29... maybe start 27... Whatever, it's one of those "When we're ready" situations. I've said it before and I'll say it again... I'm waaaay too selfish to have kids now.

So! We'll be waiting a couple years (about 2) before buying a house... so our "starter house" will have to be good enough for 2 kids, bf/gf, and the mom's home business (not sure what yet)... man, I hope they're not girls!! Maybe 1 girl.. but not 2.. poor C! haha.

(BTW... because C has given me a timeline... I'm making a "5 year" plan! hahaha. I'm a weirdo! And an intense planner :)